I have been graced with 55 years of life on this thing we call earth. I can’t say that it has all been a bed of roses, but for the most part it has been beautiful. I have lived through loss, sickness, health, wealth, lack of wealth, divorce, remarriage and everything in between. I realized that all the experiences I’ve blessed with were to be used for a greater purpose.
We all have attended a wedding for couples that are in deep love and beyond excited to spend eternity together and we share in the excitement and celebrate them. Then we leave the wedding only to hear a few years later that the couple has split apart. Why is this? We were present for the vows and commitment, but do we have any obligation after that? I believe we do! I believe that if you feel strongly enough to attend the ceremony, you should be invested on helping during the hard times instead of taking a side and helping end the union.
Divorce in America
- 50 percent of all marriages end in divorce
- In America, there is a divorce every 13 seconds
- 6,646 divorces per day
- 46,523 divorces per week
- 35k to get married 45k to get divorced
The average American couple go into debt to the tune of 35k to have the wedding of their dreams. The illusion continues as they purchase the 3500 sq. ft. house in the gated community, have 2.5 well behaved children, a golden doodle named Gucci, and all in the over priced SUV headed to the private soccer coach. The fairy tale created in our head which is fed to us by a materialistic society that we can only be successful at marriage if we acquire all the the things the Jones’s have. This is a recipe for disaster. So is it a wonder we have such a high failure rate within our American marriages?
The average price of keeping up with the Jones’s
- $117,951 average American household debt (does not include your mortgage)
- $195,000 average mortgage
- $15,956 average credit card debt
- 6.1 credit cards for an average American couple
I have had the privilege of walking along side and ministering to couples in crisis and it is an honor to use my life skills to help others get through hard seasons in their lives. The number one problem that I see while helping couples navigate through crisis, is money. The common theme I hear is that no one ever showed them how to handle money. The American dream is a financial nightmare. This is where minimalism comes into play. The more we are responsible for, the higher stakes.
How to monetarily minimize
- Live within your means (don’t buy things you can’t pay cash for)
- Stop buying stuff to impress people you don’t even know
- Build a budget and stick to it
- Shopping is not a hobby
- Love people, not stuff
I can’t help but think that when we attend and support a couple uniting that it is not only our responsibility to celebrate their beautiful day, but to also walk along side them during the tough times too. I believe that if you see them falling you need to speak up and walk them down a path that is made for success. What a great legacy it would be if we shared our life experiences to help those who are struggling and lift them up instead of tearing them down when they hit a road block. We are meant to walk together on this path of life.
If you will make the sacrifices now that most people aren’t willing to make, later on you will be able to live as those folks will never be able to live.
Dave Ramsey
If you are struggling financially and it is affecting your marriage, do not be afraid to reach out for help. Dave Ramsey’s Financial Peace University is a great place to start.
Making of a Minimalist 